It’s the start of Week 10 in the NFL, which means the start of Thursday Night football. This is Juan’s favorite time of the season, but he’s still missing and on the run from some Russian gangsters who he has yet to pay off for his gambling problem.
I worry about him, but as I so eloquently stated in my last post, he’s an animal who took out a bigfoot for food when we were in a precarious situation in the middle of winter, lost in the Sierra Nevadas. So because I’m alone and previewing the Niners Thursday night matchup with the Chicago Bears I thought I should make some calls and bring in the Bears’ legendary two-time Super Bowl champ, Jim McMahon. He will give us his pick for today’s game.
Welcome Jim. How’s it going?… Great. So, I’m good friends with your wife’s family back in Redwood City… Yeah, they’re good… How’s Casey? Ohhhhh he’s packing on the pounds… Yeah, his body definitely grew into his large head. Was his head always so big? I mean, we’ve only been friends for about 10 years now, so I don’t know what a little Casey was like… It’s always been big. Well, I’m not surprised. He did have a dirty rat tail and bleached hair so I guess that explains a lot. Maybe he was trying to compensate or distract people from seeing such a big head? Let’s get on with it, Jim…
Jim McMahon made history in 1977 by going to BYU as a Catholic, getting drunk before games, playing hungover, and never adhering to any of the rules or regulations of the university, or really any social norms. But he was a two-time All-American and set most of the BYU quarterback records, which explains why they never kicked him out. Where are those strict Mormon rules? I thought they are no joke about that sort of stuff…
Fitted with his trademark headband, sunglass, and stupid smirk.
Jim then parlayed his success at BYU into a productive career in the NFL…
Note Jim in the sunglasses and Coach Sing actually smiling on the right.
What was Coach Singletary’s line in that?
Anyways, this is a must win game for both the Bears and the Niners. The Niners come in with a deceptive 3-5 record, while the Bears are hanging in there at 4-4.
The Bears boast a solid passing game with Jay Cutler at quarterback and not much else. He’s got a golden arm and can throw the ball with the best of them, but is surrounded with inexperienced receivers. The one bright spot for the Bears would be tightend Greg Olsen, but with Patrick Willis and the linebacking corps it will be difficult to get him the ball. Also, the Bears have been embarrassed on defense the past couple of weeks. In their last three games, the once dominant Bears defense has struggled immensely, surrendering over 500 rushing yards alone. Last week was the tipping point when the Cardinals’ 32nd ranked rush game beat the Bears for over 180 on the ground.
The defense has been so bad; Vernon Davis opened his notoriously big mouth for the first time this season, tweeting he doesn’t like anyone on the Bears defense and that the Niners will dominate the Bears defense when it comes time… I wonder what Coach Sing thought of that one?
This should bode well for a Niner offense that’s proven it needs to run the ball effectively to win games. I think this is starting to sound redundant, but the result rests in Frank Gore’s hands. Singletary will put the game on Gore’s shoulders and load up on the run, especially with some glaring problems on the Bear defense. While Gore has struggled a bit this season, we should look for him to bust out and rack up lots of yards. Last week clearly showed the Niners simply aren’t ready to be a pass team, especially with obvious poor quarterback play and protection.
Still, it is difficult to stay away from the pass when you’ve got the likes of VD and soon-to-breakout-rookie star Michael Crabtree. If Smith gets the ball in their hands they will make plays. VD is a terror for linebackers because of his speed and defensive backs because of his strength. If the Niners are to pass, Smith should look to Davis across the middle all game… Hopefully the Chicago defense doesn’t try to kill Vernon on every play for his choice tweets about them…
Aside from the game, it will be the first time Singletary goes against his former team. It’s almost a crime Singletary doesn’t coach for the Bears, but their loss is San Francisco’s gain, making it a crime I’m happy committing. He’s up there with some of Chicago’s all-time greats, including Jordan and Walter Payton… Sorry Jim, you just don’t make the cut…
I hope Chicago fans squirm when they see Sing on the Niner sideline. Sorry Jim… Well let’s get to it. What’s the score?
45-13… Jim, be serious. That’s not going to happen… You’re serious?
Fine. I’m going to give my own prediction. 27-20, Niners.
Break the losing streak. If the Niners lose it will be all your fault, Alex. Pick it up. You can’t be this awful.
November 13, 2009 at 11:14 am |
Killed a bigfoot and on the run from the Russian Mob?! Haw!